Monday, January 30, 2006

Monday Blues

Now I have another reason to hate Mondays. Weekends get so intense (and also so much fun) now with so much time spent with Ayaan that it’s really hard to leave him on Monday morning to come to work.

Today, for the first time, he was really upset to see me go and cried a lot. At moments like these, my decision to come back to work really wavers a lot. But that’s all I can do – waver. Because being a stay at home mom is just not an option for me. There are many reasons:

  1. We just bought a house
    And there is no way we can pay back the loan on just one salary
  2. Others’ Expectations
    I am worried about all the people who will be disappointed in me if I just working. My mom (who managed to do it all), my husband (who didn't ask to be saddled with a non-working wife), my friends (most of whom work)...
  3. My Own Fears
    Will I become boring? Will my brain stagnate? Will I get terribly bored? Will I make Ayaan spoiled and dependent? Will it be really hard to find a good job once Ayaan grows up a little?

As I said earlier, quitting my job is not an option. So all I can do is carry on hating Mondays….

4 comments:

  1. rukmanihaldea3:04 pm

    Just checking if i am sending teh merssage properly

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  2. Dearest Sunshine Girl,
    What's happened to all the optimism and sunshine? Baby, these blues will be there at times but this is part of life. Start enjoying Ayaan to the maximum and later u will find that being at work is good for both of u. He will be proud of yr work. Moreover as he grows older both need space and this is one good way of doing it. By the way incase u decide to give up working I will not be disappointed. I will back whatever decision u take. It should however be taken after deep thinking of pros and cons.Always remember we are all there by yr side all the time.

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  3. I was very touched to read mama's comment. Such unstincting acceptance and support for you Rohini. I support whatever she has written.
    These are moments that you will cherish with a kind of sadness and joy, when you realse Ayaan's growing so fast, orlater when Ayaan is away.

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  4. I stumbled upon this and find myself grappling with similar questions these days - exactly 2 years since your post. I haven't decided which way I'll finally swing, but I hope that I'll find some inspiration as I skim through the archives.

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    null pointer

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