Friday, December 28, 2012

Give us this day our daily bed (without any kids in it)

Millions of parents around the world are happy to do it, but co-sleeping is not for me. As babies, both slept in cots (in my room) till they were 18 months old and in their own room post that age. The only times they have shared my bed have involved nightmares or illness. And, of course, travel.

On our first night in Bangalore, I felt somewhat sentimental about the fact that I was going to sleep next to my little angels. The warm, fuzzy feeling lasted less than an hour after I actually got into bed with them and got a solid kick in the gut. Yes, the younger one clearly dreams about soccer in her sleep. The older one doesn't move around much thankfully when he is asleep but when he does move, it is usually with the intention of yanking away the covers.

And then there is me. I can never entirely relax when they are sleeping next to me. When they were babies, I worried about rolling over on to them and now I keep feeling the urge to check on them - whether they are headed for a collision course with each other, are sleeping too close to the edge or have kicked off their covers.

Also, I am a pillow hugger. I sleep best when I have a pillow to snuggle up to. That is a luxury I have to give up with the kids in bed with me because there's simply no place. (This is the point where I have to wonder what it says about me as a mother that I prefer the company of a inanimate pillow to my beloved children when I sleep.)

On the whole, I am feeling rather sleep-deprived, put-upon and irritable and cannot wait to get back home and have them back in their own beds while I enjoy some quality time with my pillow. 


  1. Anonymous3:34 pm

    Haha.. u said it.. just wot was in my mind... Well written...

  2. You're so right.. I wish I'd started earlier. When my kids were six I tried to put them in a separate bed. It's been almost 6 months now and eachtime without fail they troop over to our room sometime during the night. I've learnt to cherish the first few hours of my sleep.

  3. Ah.... How sweet! I love the dirty, bouncy, comfort smelling pillow too.... Kids are sauntering into my room anytime in the night and sleeping on the back-up mattress on our bedroom floor. But, holidays and I totally understand what you are going through. Suddenly more limbs flying around when they are on your bed.....

  4. It was a crib all along for my older one, and thankfully younger one got conned into sleeping in the same room as older sis ;). I totally relate to those football kicks, always the case with my 2.

  5. We have our big king bed and on other side their twin beds. But after our move now, we finally just two days back moved their beds to their room. And to get them used to it, we sleep on a sleeping bag in the middle of their beds. Hoping that in a few days they will be ok w/out us. KG is totally ok with it, it is KB who would rather be with us. He was in tears the first night. It felt so sad like we were pushing him out of our room. We had to make it sound like an adventure for him to accept it. He is still somewhat of an innocent and soft natured child. I have not slept in our room since we moved their beds and I find the room so empty when I walk in though!

    1. So sweet. Mine have never really slept with us so they don't know any different.

  6. I love my pillow too:) I miss it a lot when we travel. It's been decades since there was a child sleeoing with us, but it was never too bad once they actually slept through, kicks notwithstanding. Or maybe that's just the rosiness of the ancient past:)